Roadkill Etiquette

• if you see a group of buzzards hanging around a fence line chatting, this is where the buffet line starts.




• The bigger the animal, the more care you'll need getting around it safely, without throwing up, or worse, running over it.




• The hotter the temperature, the more involved your senses get when nearing roadkill.




• Exhale through the nose within about 10 feet from the animal. Do not inhale until you are at least 15 yards beyond the unfortunate beast.




• If you choose to look at the road kill, always remember the view you take with you will stay with you, in full color. You will see that animal in your mind's eye for some time.




• The flatter the roadkill, the less precautions needed to pass safely.




• Roadkill becomes increasingly flatter and flatter, to the point where you are convinced it is just a cartoon version of a real animal. This makes the horrible fact that roads routinely eat animals 24/7 a little less horrible.




• The most common roadkill seen to date is by far, the Armadillo. We still hope to see a live one, but not yet. Almost all of them end up on their backs, tiny feet pointing skyward, spear-like tail jutting straight out onto the road.




• The largest animal seen was a wild boar, as big as a small cow. Scary.




• There were more snakes (several rattlers) seen in east Texas and west Louisiana than any other area.




• Most unusual potential roadkill were three javalina seen on the way to Sanderson, Texas. They trot with a cocky, short stride. The trio we saw exhibited no apparent fear of the highway, trotting right up to the edge and then back to the fence line. Very strange:

• Luckiest soon-to-be roadkill: Three box turtle in varied conditions stranded in the road. Chris found one upside down, untouched on the centerline. She's started the East Texas Box Turtle Rescue Mission. She's the only volunteer. I'm the traffic lookout.

over and out